There’s nothing sweeter than that feeling when you’re leaning into your orgasm but not quite at the finish line. All the panting and the electricity, that throbbing pulse that matches your heartbeat. I enjoy sex with people who have penis and/or vaginas. I’ve spent just as much time digging through other peoples’ drawers as much as my own, and no one’s ever hesitated to tell me what feels good. Likewise, I always tell people what feels good to me. Here’s four pieces of advice any bi or pansexual can rely on in their sexy adventures.
Anyone can do a kegel. If you have a hole you like getting filled then your partner (this is assuming your partner is penetrating you with their penis) will definitely enjoy when you clamp down on them. It makes you feel tighter and shows your partner how much you’re enjoying having them inside you. Practice with and without things in your hole, simply by clenching the muscles. Both the vagina and anus are muscles so they’ll get stronger over time and it’ll make sex more sensitive for both you and your partner.
Use If ’em You Got Them
When you’re going down on someone who has a vagina, try to think of it as two targets. You can hit the clit and the hole separately but if you hit both hard enough you can make your partner moan like it’s a demonic possession. The best thing you can do in this situation is suck on the clit while sticking your fingers in their hole (or holes, if y’all are really dedicated). Even if you don’t have fingers you can just stick your stump inside them.
This one is for orally pleasuring someone with a penis. It’s a little tough so practice as you see fit, either on a dick or a cucumber. When you’ve got their shaft as far down your throat as you can get it, try and slither your tongue out of your mouth. It’ll be tough because it pushes the head of the penis against your gag reflex but again that’s why we practice, people! Your partner will love this move because it again tightens around their shaft. It’s a definite way to hear your partner say “Oh fuck” unless you’ve gagged them.
Dr. Feels Good… Oh Yeah Right There
Everyone’s hole is different. Some spots are sweeter than others, and they vary from person to person. If you masturbate penetratively you’ll find out where they are on yourself, and why let that information die there? When you’re getting fucked, tell your partner exactly what kind of stroke you want and what angle. If you gotta stimulate your penis or clit get it stimulated, either jerk yourself off or ask them to do it. Don’t be afraid to ride a dick hands forward because that can almost create the illusion that you’re the one topping.
These are far from the commandments and only a few of many, many pieces of information that can advance your sexual skills.
Remember to use protection, take your PrEP, and definitely get consent. Those aren’t tips, those are just the rules.
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